When it comes to making scary movies, there’s only one option left: make them yourself. And while you might be able to create some of the most terrifying scenes imaginable with your own hands and a few creative ideas, it’s not always possible to make movies that are actually scary. If you’re into that kind of thing, then check out these 10 horror movies that are actually funny!
Because what’s scarier than being scared? Working on your own version of the scariest movie in history (which will probably involve a lot of explosions) and seeing how much fun you can have making it as scary as possible? It’s giving yourself exactly what’s called “personal nightmare craft”. It’s creating your own nightmare film from scratch – without the threatening themes and plot devices common in Hollywood.
The Legend Of The horrid woodsman
This is one of the most bizarre, bizarre and bizarrely bizarre scary stories ever told. One of many “stuck in the past” types, this tale is based on a children’s book and involves a witch who haunts the woods near her home. As the years pass, more and more of this story comes to light, sometimes leading to revelations about the real witch’s past, her feelings for other people, and her plans to end the world. In all, there are seven different stories based on this book, and there are also many other origins and accounts of the same woodsman legend.
All seven stories are different, but all share one thing in common: their horror is unheimlich. Unbeknown to the adult reader, all seven stories also have fun, creepy twists and turns and are all very different from one another, making them all just as scary as one another.
When life gives you no license
This tale makes you wonder about the ethics of having a career as a writer. In two different ways, the one and a half hour film about a driver who mistakes motor vehicles for humans and ends up crashing into a canal and being eaten by a porpoise based on his own dashboard camera, and one day becoming a “free spirit” and capturing the imagination of the world, is both chilling and spooky.
Both tales involve roads where there is no left turn and no lights or traffic and only the sounds of the road itself to guide the driver. Both tales are also very different from one another and are also very scary. One could even say that the most famous of these is “free” because the other stories are all about him being eaten by a porpoise.
The Great Horror Movie: The missing link
A tale of a man who, due to a freak accident, ends up transformed into a 110ft tall black creature, with four heads, a score of arms, a tail and two legs, who can walk on his back and use his hands to control the weather, has four legs and four heads, and is the walking, talking, talking horror classic that everyone loves to hate.
There is a reason this tale has been circulate for hundreds of years – because it’s just so darn scary. The first film based on this tale is probably “The Exorcist”, which is actually pretty scary, but the two other two tales are both even more so.
Jaws! And then more Jaws!
What is even more scary than a Jaws fish is the shark that follows it! The creatures of the sea are usually pretty friendly, but this 10 foot long black mackerel, which looks like it’s on the strength of six of its 11 legs, is 100% aggressive. It’s one of the most popular ocean creatures and is known to attack ships and fisheries near its home port of shark Island in the South China Sea. All it needs is a mako, a reef or a really strong reefer to make it really scary.
The Blair Witch Project – and why it’s not scary enough
The Blair Witch Project is a supernatural film that stars a girl who turns into a werewolf during a ritual, which involves her consuming a powerful witch doctor. In all, she transforms into a werewolf, her doctor, and her victim. The film is very different from the true stories of the witch doctor and werewolf legends, yet it is also very much in the spirit of that type of story telling. The plot follows a similar path as the aforementioned “The Exorcist”, but takes the werewolf form to a new level. It’s a Hollywood classic with a twist, but in all honesty, you’re probably better off without it.
Ghoulish Scary Movies
In addition to the seven different stories above, there are many many, many different versions of the same woodsman. Some people will only see one version, while others will see ten. Some people will see only the eyes and ears, while others will see the whole body. Some will see him as a boy, while others will see him as a girl. All these different kinds of stories are all basically the same thing: they are all just different versions of the same woodsman story. All of them are also all different in their horror, but all share one thing in common: their unheimlich.
As scary as it is, it’s not always easy to make a movie that isn’t scary. This is especially true for horror classics, where finding the perfect mixture of scary and ridiculous can be difficult. But with a bit of creativity, you can create a movie that actually has some sense of humor, and is not afraid to venture out into the unknown. If you’ve been feeling a little stuck, or just want some help with your own brand of scary, check out these 10 scary movies that actually have a point.